The Difference Between Being Offended and Being Harmed
Somewhere along the way, it feels like we've started treating offense and harm as though they are the same thing. I don't believe they are. Before you continue reading, let me be clear: being offended is real. The emotional reaction is real. The discomfort is real. The feelings that arise are real. But being offended and being harmed are not necessarily the same experience. To me, offense is largely based on perspective. Harm is based on evidence. That's an important distinction. A person can be offended by a word, an opinion, a belief, a lifestyle, a joke, a decision, or even a simple difference in values. The offense exists. The reaction exists. But that doesn't automatically mean harm has occurred. When we stop distinguishing between offense and harm, we risk giving the same weight to a bruised belief as we do to a genuine injury. And those are not the same thing. Offense Often Lives in the Story Imagine two people hearing the exact same statement. One shrugs and m...